Carbon Credits Gone Wild
Posted by Warren Peterson on June 3, 2008
Al Gore and a host of politicians, mainly on the Left, want to impose a carbon cap and trade scheme on the American taxpayers. Under the plan, limits would be set on carbon usage and entities that exceed the limits would be forced to buy credits from those that are under the limits. It could be just the beginning. There are several, maybe endless, subsets to a carbon cap and trade market. Here are a couple of possibilities:
Child Carbon Cap (CCC) – Increasing population increases the carbon load on the environment. Every baby requires a lifetime of air (oxygen in, CO2 out) not to mention nourishment, clothing, housing and transportation all of which add CO2. Under the CCC, every couple that wanted a second child would have to buy a child carbon credit from a fertile couple that did not want more than one child. Of course Hollywood stars would be exempted as well as welfare mothers that need additional children to fatten thier public assistance checks. Failure to pay gets the offending couple a one way ticket to China.
Fat People Carbon Cap (FPCC) – Everyone knows that fat people have to breathe harder to move about and they eat too much thus pumping more CO2 into the atmosphere. With the FPCC, fat people would be required to buy fat people carbon credits from underweight people. The penalty for noncompliance would be a permanent ban from McDonald’s and the Old Country Buffet.
SUV Gas Cap (SUVGC) – No greater threat to the environment exists than the dreaded sports utility vehicle (SUV). Its carbon footprint can squash two Yugos in the time it takes to run a red light. Under the SUV Gas Cap, one would have to buy gas credits from hybrid owners. Sure some people need SUVs because of work or weather or they’re too fat for a Prius, but they’ll just have to pay for their polluting gas hogs.
I’m sure you can think of some other carbon caps. Set up a cap and trade market and one of them might even make you rich but the taxpayers poor.
(Thanks to Bob S. for suggesting this post.)